Dear Bethany ~~ 1 year letter

If you want to read the letter I wrote to Bethany before she was born it is here and her 6 month one is here

Well on the 9th the little possum turns one. I can't believe it really it seems like yesterday I was looking at a positive pregnancy test! This has been the hardest year of my life but ohhhhh the rewards. I have no words. Here I am going to share the 1 year letter that I have written for Bethany. I am not sure when she will get these letters but they are all there for her anyway.

Dear Bethany,

It is your first birthday. I find it hard to believe that you have been here in our lives for a whole year. In some ways it has flown by, in others it seems like a lifetime. Most of all I can’t remember when you weren’t in life. Being your mamma is the light of my days and I can’t tell you the joy I get watching you grow and change. I know I am blessed to be able to stay at home with you full time and I thank God for that daily.

These past 6months you have really grown and changed. Well not so much grown you are still petite!! But you are very sweet. Everyone comments that you are like a doll. You have lots of tricks and can do all sorts now. You like to clap hands and play peek a boo. You also LOVE playing chasings with daddy around the house. You are a super fast crawler and sometimes beat him! You have nearly 11 teeth now!! And you love eating solid foods. Some of your favorites’ are apple, rice crackers, chewing on rusks, sandwiches. You also love sharing daddies toast in the morning! In fact you love sharing in whatever we are eating.

You started going to Family Day Care too when you were 8 months old. One day a week on a Wednesday. Your Day Care Mum is Louise and you love her! She calls you her “supa babie”!! You have lots of fun with your friends doing craft and going to the park and dancing. Your favorite however is the sandpit! You love it and eat a lot of the sand as well!! You also love water play time. You really like Louise’s and when we pull up out the front you start clapping your hands and babbling away in your little language.

You are talkative and babble on in your little language but you do have some words too. “Hello” was your first word, and then “dada” you can say “bub-bub” and finally after waiting and waiting you said “mum-mum”!! I love it when you say that!

You have still kept your delightful relaxed personality. You like giving people hugs and get passed around at church!! You always seem to be smiling and relaxed. We are so blessed. You love your bath time at night and settle to sleep really well.

In the past year I have seen you grow from a baby to the start of a little girl and I am so proud of you and feel so blessed to have been chosen to be your mamma. I pray that I can keep guiding you and leading you in God’s ways that you can know Him more and more each day. I ask Him for the wisdom to be able to be your mamma and that one day I will have the awesome privilege of seeing you accept Him as your own personal Saviour.

With all my love my darling girl
Mamma

A Recent Car trip

Coming home from hospital

Never Limit God

Hello once again!
Many of you would know that for awhile I stepped back from blogging to care for Bethany. Well we have seen an answer to prayer that can't NOT be shared. To recap Bethany had a minor birth defect that although not life threatening or serious did need to be dealt with quickly. We had a lot of trouble with doctors and the like due to our isolation and other factors. Anyway we finally found a doctor who was prepared to do the procedure needed to fix the problem. This was 3 weeks ago. It meant a short operation for Bethany but still a risk as she is under 12months and quite small for her age so the anesthetic was going to be a risk. We just prayed and asked others to join us that Bethany would be safe and well, that Gods will for her would be done. Well today was meant to be the day of the operation. Notice I said meant. Yesterday I checked and things looked different in the area concerned VERY different. I contacted our family doctor and she said to come in and she would have a look. She agreed that things had indeed changed for the better and infact there was no defect left to do surgery on. Whilst we were praying for a safe operation God had a better plan in mind, No operation at all!!! Praise His Name!!

What I have learnt from this is although you can be praying for one thing, God may be thinking something totally different. Never place a limit on God. The best pray is quite simply Thy will be done oh Lord.

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So now that I am back in sorts I am going to try to return to blogging. I have missed it and you all dreadfully. So much has happened in recent months I scarce know where to start in bringing you up to date. As you can tell from the ticker at the top Bethany is heading toward her 1st birthday way to fast!! The invitations and other party items have been choosen and all are VERY pink!! We are having a BBQ at the beach with family and friends and look forward to a good afternoon. I will be sure to share some of the photos. She has grown and changed so much of late it is hard to remember the little baby she was. She is the turbo charged crawler and can stand holding furniture as well as walk around it. She is a little talker although mostly in her own little language!! But she does say "hello" "hi" bye" (all with waves!!) "dad dad" and "mummum" I admit the last one is my favourite! She said dadad first but when she started with mumum it has been worth it!! :) She is pretty cheeky and loves singing and dancing. Peek a boo is also a favourite. All in all she is a delight. Raising her is a joy and I am thankful each day for the blessing of being her mamma and being able to see these moments (even the not so nice moments!!).

On a not so happy note like many my husband lost his job in these hard times. The past months have not been easy as we tried to figure out what to do next and the like. Andrew wants to retrain in IT but it is proving hard to get in to the course he wants. Also it is a big change having him home all the time!! Sometimes a blessing but a change. There have been times of stuggle and frustration and I am sure there will be more to come before we are out of this valley for good but we are trying to just hold on to the Lord and see what His plans are for us through this.

Well it would be a shame to end with out sharing a photo of the nearly one year old!!

Blessings

A break from blogging for the time being at least

Hello my dear bloggy friends.
I feel so bad each time I see that I haven't updated in so long. Although I get on the computer to read and occasionally comment I don't have the time to write like I used to and ohhh I miss it!!

But more importantly there have been some developments in our lives with Bethany's health that means my focus in the coming weeks and months need to be her. Andrew and I are coming to realise we will be faced with some tough decisions and times ahead so again time that I would spend writing is being spent with my beloved and my little possum.

I will miss writing and sharing my thoughts but I will still hop on and see what is happening in each of your blogs and maybe even share a thought or two! I just need to take the pressure off writing my own for a time.

In the future as things develop and we learn more with Bethany's health I will most likely open a private blog for updates and prayer requests. We realise we will need God as we take this journey and the prayers of many are powerful. It will however be a private blog. Andrew and I have discussed it and due to the nature of Bethany's illness we feel that is best. If you want to be added please email me with the link on the side.

But for now I will leave you with my love and prayers. Know that I have loved writing and sharing my thoughts and hearing yours in return. I have been blessed with friendships around the world and I treasure them as much as I do my friendships in real life.

I wish you and yours Gods abundant blessings!!
Amy

Where do babies come from??

From boxes of course!! Delivered by FedEx early in the morning!!!

I hope all is well for my readers this week. We have had a funny kind of week. I am adjusting our schedule trying to get Bethany in to a better rhythm for day time sleeps so she isn't so overtired at night. It has been a challenge. Already at nearly 7 months I can see that she has a strong little will. She is very independent. She like to fed her self with the solids we have each day. Messy but cute! She likes to find her toys and try and get to them herself and gets so frustrated when she can't, she is nearly crawling but not quite and I think the frustration of not being freely mobile is driving her bonkers!! She is now the proud owner of 3 teeth and looks cute with her toothy grin. I can see the days of little baby behind us now, she is growing in to a little girl. Part of me is sad naturally but part of me loves watching her grow and change each day. You just never know what she is going to come up with next! Who knows maybe she will be posting soon!! LOL

This Sunday is my first official Mothers day. I sort of celebrated last year as I was 17 weeks pregnant but I was also in hospital so Andrew brought me in a cake and some flowers to cheer me up!! I am madly trying to get gifts and cards ready for Andrews mum and grandma who live near us as well as something to send away to my own mum. I have been thinking alot about my mum lately, the sacrifices she made. Particularly staying in an abusive relationship. Some of you will know my mums story but in short, my mum has been emotionally abused by my dad since as long as I can remember. Eventually it all came to a head 1 week after I found out I was pregnant. He accused her of trying to poison him and got the police involved. The police found there was no evidence and left the matter. So my dad told mum to pack her bags she was out. Mum had no income, no way of supporting herself, no money. She had been with dad in the family business for years and he controlled EVERYTHING. She went to her sister's and there he left her except to pop up now and then with upsetting phone calls. She went through what I am sure were some dark days and times but has come out the other side with a new life for herself. I am so proud of what she has achieved for herself. I envy her strength. I am in awe of her sheer drive to go on. So when it came time to name my daughter I knew I wanted those things passed on in someway. So Bethany is Bethany Jean. Bethany because we wanted her to have a biblical name and my two favourite bible women are Mary and Martha and Jean for my mother (its her middle name as well). So although my mum doesn't read this blog. Happy mothers day mum, I am so proud of you and love you so very much!! xoxo

At Home or School??

Most days I drive past the local primary (elementary) school. It has one of those signs out the front where you change the letters, like some churches have. Anyway this week's message has been: Breakfast now available from 8:10am. Now this may been seen as a good thing in some lights. I am sure that many many children are either skipping this important meal (adults too...come on be honest...) or having something that is pretty much the same as skipping it. A sugar packed, additive filled something. However that is not what I want to discuss. Looking at this sign at least twice a day lead me to do some figures. Now I am not claiming to be the best at maths in fact it was probably my worse subject but this really hit my heart.



Ready?



Here the average school day is 9-3 I am sure there are variances for different schools but we are working on averages here. So that is 6 hrs.

Now you can drop your child off at lets say 8am (easier to do maths with whole numbers!) that is an extra hour so we are now at 7hrs.

After school there are a myriad of actives and after school care centres. Just take your pick. Again on average most of these run till 6pm. We now have a 10hr day for your child.



Now we know that there are 24hrs in a day. If you take in to account that the recommended sleep for say a 5-6yr old is 8-10hrs we have 14hrs left. 10 of those hrs have been given to the school so what do you have left? 4 hrs a day. That is less than a quarter of a day with your child.



I am not pointing this out to have a go at those who send their children to school. Personally we are planning to home school as I have mentioned before. I am blessed that I can stay at home full time. However this is something I am passionate about and seeing this sign day after day reminded me again why I am so passionate about home education. Does society realise that our children, the next generation is spending more time away from their families than ever before? What will the consequence of that action be? How do you effectively parent a child that you only see 4 hrs or so a day? How does that child build a relationship with you that they can tell you what is honestly going on in their life when you only have this small amount of contact? For most of these questions I have no answers but the last one I can give a real example because it is from my own life.



I am one of 2 children and both my parents worked. Initially my mum worked part time but when we were in high school my mum started to work full time again. We were a busy family. My brother had sports on the weekend and I had music throughout most the week. My dad often worked late and my mum was a nurse so did shift work. However I am close to my mum and always have been but that didn't help in this situation. In year 10 I was the victim of some pretty awful bulling. I am still dealing with some of the scars to this day. Not physical the kind that run much deeper. I started "faking" sick to get out of school. Having panic attacks before having to leave and then I would end up staying at home. Coming home sick during the day. After 3 weeks of this mum was able to get me to talk and open up about what was going on. Now I am not casting blame on my mum and dad saying they should have been mind readers nor am I saying that its their fault for sending me to school and not home school me. Lets face it when I was at school home school was pretty new on the agenda. But it was hard for our family to talk and for that reason what was happen came out much later than it could have. This was back a bit too when there wasn't as much happening in parents or children's lives. Imagine now? Imagine if it wasn't just a case of bulling but worse. Its hard to think about isn't it?



I have always wondered why society tell us that at the age of 5 suddenly mum and dad are not good enough to be the teachers? With the proper tools anyone can teach anyone. It happens all the time in the work force, its called workplace training. You are give the study material and someone to supervise and off you go. Why do we believe that children must be with other children the same age and all learn the same way? Yet one of the things taught at school is that we are all individuals and that we can lead whatever lifestyle we choose. Over the past few years I have watched my friends children with interest as they go through school and what they bring home in ideas and concepts. My friends son has told his mother that she has no rights over him cause he is the child and he can report her. His home reading book was "My 2 daddy's" about a homos**ual family. Her daughter tell her mum that she won't go to her room for punishment because it makes her feel bad and she doesn't have to do things that make her feel bad. The come back when asked who told you that, "My teacher". Mmm I don't have a problem with lessons on reading and writing and a bit of arithmetic (although the good old 3 r's are sadly lacking) but these are things I would rather not brought in to my home.

I understand that out there there are families who have to use the schools system as both mum and dad work or for whatever reason homeschooling is not for them. Lets face it unless you are passionate about it, it is very hard to make a commitment like homeschooling work. I wanted to show you these numbers though to get you thinking. If you do send you children to school do you use the time you have them at home wisely or are they on the computer or watching TV? Do you eat as a family and talk and share? Are you cramming to many activities in at the cost of time as a family unit? And the biggest question of all can my child talk to me about anything they may encounter at school? Be it a bully, a funny story or God forbid that older child or adult that made them do something "funny". If you are sitting on the fence about homeschooling go and find out more. It has been a passion of mine for many many years, in fact in praying for my future husband one of the qualities I asked God for was that he was passionate about home school!! God answered cause not only is my husband passionate about it, he was home educated! I have spent lots of time with families who home educate, all using different styles and curriculum's. Some not using a curriculum and "unschooling". Before I feel pregnant I spent one day a week schooling a family of 4 while the mum did her groceries and chores. All this was able to show me again and again that it was something I loved. I encourage you to do the same. Most homeschooling families are open to sharing and encourage polite questions (Not the good old how do you socialise them one!!) and finally if you are like me and already sold on homeschooling perhaps you can file these numbers away in your head for when you need some encouragement or if someone asks you why you want to home school.

How do they see the world?

I recently finished reading a book. This isn't really noteworthy news, Andrew marvels at how fast I can go through a book. This was not a particularly long one so I finished it in one sitting (well one soaking to be precise. I was soaking in a nice warm bath having some time out after little Possum had gone to bed.) The book I read was called "The Boy in Stripped Pyjamas. I wanted to read it because the movie has just opened and I was in two minds to go and see it. I think I will now though. For those who don't know about the story it tells of a 9 year old boy who moves with his family from their comfortable home in Berlin to "Out-with" (Auschwitz) His father works with the "fury" (Fuhrer) He notices a sort of farm out of his new window but there are no animals only people in stripped pyjamas. He doesn't know about the Final Solution or anything his only concern is that his friends are back in Berlin. Even his mother doesn't know what happens in the camp (although she later finds out). One day he heads out exploring and meets a boy on the other side of the fence. A little boy his age in stripped pyjamas. The become friends and share the next year. Mostly sitting at the fence and talking. I won't go in to the rest because if you haven't read it I will spoil it!!

The boy in the book Bruno saw what was going on around him completely differently. He didn't see a Jewish boy on the other side of the fence he saw a potential playmate. He didn't see the dictator of his country he saw a short little man called fury. He didn't even realise he was in Poland for many months.

This got me to thinking how do our children see what is happening? God gives children such innocence yet such a desire to be inquisitive.

A recent example of children see our world, that although I haven't seen first hand I have enjoyed watching via blog land is that of my dear blogging friend Amy at Clothesline Alley daughter Peapod. Peapods father has been on a long deployment (12 months) to Kuwait or The Sandy Place. It has been funny and sweet and at time heart wrenching to see how this little person sees her world now that daddy is in "wait". She has had to add this in to her life somehow. I remember Amy sharing that intially Peapod would put her daddy's clothes by the door each night not grasping that daddy had left for a long time. Yet as time has passed, slowly for them I am sure Peapod as adapted this in to her little world. I think my favourite story that Amy shared was when they made a snowman village and Peapod named it 'wait!! Yet in her little mind this is how she is seeing the world and for the time being 'wait is a part of that world, so why can't it be on the mantelpiece with snowmen?

I have found myself wondering how little possum will see the world. Unfortunately she will see a broken marriage as around the same time I fell pregnant my parents separated and even more unfortunately it isn't pleasant. I wonder how in a home where we try to teach the sanctity of marriage that will affect her. She will grow up seeing mental illness. Will the world teach her to fear me? I pray that she see faith everyday. I make an effort even now for her to see me praying and reading my bible. I want her to see that faith is a daily living thing not a "Sunday"thing. She will no doubt see death. She is blessed to have great grandparents living nearby but grandad isn't as young as he once was. Will we be able to show her to celebrate ones life and not their passing? And as all this and more goes on around her I find myself watching her wondering how she is seeing it all. Does the world look kinder or nicer with childhood innocence? And when did I lose mine? Maybe I will try to see things from little possums point of view. Regain some of that innocence and trust. After all I have much to be thankful.

Prayers for Jimena

Many of you would know Jimena at Do good and Communicate. She and her husband are expecting the arrival of their first blessing anytime in the next 24hr via C-Section. Jimena and the baby are fine. I know some of you will worry!! I am not sure about the times, I am so bad at time zones so just be in prayer for them as God places them on your hearts. This is a much loved and cherished baby as it was never meant to come about for them. The Lord as already done great things. Jimena is not due home till after the 19th if you want to try reaching her then.

Till then may I be the first to say CONGRATULATIONS Jimena and Raphael!! May your new little one bring you a life time of joy. The Lord bless and keep the three of you as you become a family!!